Farewell Otis!

 Today we got back from a retreat with the high schoolers. We traveled north 8 hours to go play in the snow in Michigan. It was an amazing weekend and Ella was such a good little traveler but boy were we ready to get home. There is something so comforting in just thinking about home. I always start longing for my routine at home. I long for the comfort of my favorite chair, the photos of people we love surrounding me, the smells, the way only the 2 of us know where everything is in all this crazy unorganized mess :).

Tonight that home feeling is forever changed...

When Sean and I got engaged he didn't have to spend any money on my ring. It is a family heirloom from my side of the family that was passed down to him from my mother... instead Sean bought me a Pug. An engagement present so to speak. My whole life I had wanted a pug named Otis and along with making my dreams of marrying him come true Sean also fulfilled this dream of mine. Otis was a little turd from the start! He loved to snuggle and play and chew up paper, but he also loved to hike his leg up and pee on everything he thought should be "his". He always darted out the door when we opened it and then would loom just slightly out of our reach when we tried to get him to come back inside... never really running out of our line of sight... Just enough to make us chase him.

Otis has always been a part of the life Sean and I are building together. He was our little baby in our first tiny apartment. He went crazy with us when we bought our home and had more space than we knew what to do with. He cuddled with me every time there was negative pregnancy tests during the year it took us to conceive. He sat around and was lazy with me all day when I was in my third trimester and SO TIRED. He protectively and curiously watched Ella as we brought her home. He cried when she cried and loved to play with her and lick all over her face. She was nervous about him at first but always warmed up after a few minutes. Sure he pooped in her room a couple of times and hid in the closet when I yelled for him, sure he peed on Sean's pillow once because he was mad at us for leaving the house, sure he chewed up Seans glasses and Sean had to wear really ugly prescription safety glasses for a long time until we could afford new glasses for him, sure he drank out of the toilet every chance he got... but he was ours, our baby, our engagement pug... he made this house our home!

Tonight we are grieving the loss of our beloved friend. He got loose from his tie-out when we put him out to do his business before bed and ran in front of a car. Luckily it was a State Policeman who was compassionate and truly sorry. I felt so bad for him as he knocked on our door and asked if it was our dog in the road. How awful he must have felt as I held my daughter on my hip and sobbed while my husband picked our sweet little puppy up off of the pavement. I thank God that it happened quickly. Not even time for him to cry or whimper. I also thank God for an amazing husband who held it together long enough to bury our baby in backyard in front of our apple tree.

We held each other and cried. Talked about how Otis taught us true patience and walked inside to snuggle with our daughter.

Farewell Otis! You were better than any engagement gift I could have ever imagined!